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The Third Annual ANVIL Award Celebration!

08-31-2014 | By Jeff Day |

Labor Day weekend here in the States signals the greatly anticipated arrival of the annual ANVIL Award gathering put on by those inveterate audio statesmen, Stephaen Harrell (6Moons) and Pete Riggle (Pete Riggle Audio Engineering). In the photo below, that's Stephaen on the left, Pete on the right, and this year's ANVIL awardee, 'My Last Pair of Speakers' Harry  Zweben, in the center.

Stephaen Harry Pido

In case you've never heard of the the ANVIL Award, it's the ultimate annual audio award for the Audiophile Not Very Intelligent Lately, and is the audio equivalent of the cherished Ig Nobel Prize in the scientific community. That's David Rives holding the esteemed ANVIL Award with past and future awardees listed!

ANVIL Award 2014 Harry Zweben My Last Pair of Speakers

The ANVIL Award is celebrated with great hoopla here in the Pacific Northwest, with invitees traveling great distances to attend (well, ok, from as far away as Portland, Oregon, anyways), and with copious amounts of delicious food prepared by chef Stephaen, and with many tasty beverages to be imbibed as well!

David Rives & Harry Zweben

David (above) started the roasting & toasting of Harry (right) by sharing a number of Harry 'isms,  like the now standard "These are my last pair of speakers!", which Harry proclaims with each new pair of speakers.

David Rives & Harry Zweben 2

Harry takes a bow to acknowledge the good natured roasting & toasting. Yes, we have all lost count of the vast number of speakers that have been Harry's 'last pair of speakers', so thus the engraving on the plaque for 2014's ANVIL Award reads "Harry Zweben, My Last Speakers".

David Rives presents Harry Zweben the 2014 ANVIL Award

Above, Harry accepts the 2014 ANVIL Award from David, to the applause from all of this year's appreciative attendees!

Harry Zweben and the 2014 ANVIL Award

You rock, Harry!

You might have noticed that I mentioned that the ANVIL Award looks into both the past and future, and this year's award ceremony included a look into the future as prophesied by The Great ANVIL called "The Twelve Months of Anvil".

Each attendee read their part from the holy writ of this prophetic look into the future:

Ron Barbee reading the twelve months of anvil

Ron "Still Crazy After All These Years" Barbee started the reading, "At some point in the early 21st century, a bizarre Pagan ritual began to take shape in the pre-apocalyptic (P.A.), pre-flood region of an area once known as Central Washington, inhabited by Desert Dwellers."

(The Great Anvil added, "Washington was one of 50 "states" or small territories that existed before the Grand Unification of 2063.")

Then the next reader, yours truly, started reading the sacred text ...

Jeff Day reading the twelve months of anvil

"This tribe enjoyed meeting between the Winter and Summer equinox, partaking of large meals and copious amounts of alcohol ...

(In the back ground, The Great Anvil says, "Alcohol refers to a class of intoxicating beverages that were imbibed orally, before the discovery and creation of Lullify") Did I mention that Pete read the part of The Great Anvil? He was great!

Pete reading

... comparing their experiences of audio equipment ...

(The Great Anvil then says, "Audio equipment refers to boxes of metal and wires that were used to listen to music prior to the discovery and creation of TeleMusik")

... in the hope of re-creating the illusion of "live" music in their dwellings, by listening to "recordings".

(The Great Anvil says, "Recordings were small discs made of carbon compounds that were spun on archaic "phonographs" and other machines connect to Audio Equipment to listen to "music", prior to the advent of TeleMusik)

Stephaen reading

Next Stephaen reads from the hallowed text, "These meetings marked the beginning of the Twelve Months of Anvil. Anthropologists now agree that Anvil, like Christmas, Channukah, Kwanzaa, and Festivus before it, was a seasonal celebration of life marked by singing of "Carols".

(The Great Anvil then says, "Many anthropologists believe that Carols were "songs" that were created and performed by humanoids prior to the advent of Lullify and TeleMusik, when humanoids created music for "enjoyment." "The Twelve Days of Christmas" was an example of a "Carol")

kara reading

Then The Tube Wizard, Kara Chaffee, began to read from the sacred text, "The "Twelve Months of Anvil" is one such Carol, attributed to a Harry Zweben, but it is generally believed that he was a disreputable vagabond of pre-flood "Oregon" who managed to avoid arrest and incarceration most of his ill-spent life. Historians believe that the song is stolen or at least loosely based upon an ancient Carol called "The Twelve Days of Christmas" dating from around 1780 P.A. as Zweben is not considered to have been possessed of musical knowledge or talent."

Gloria Riggle reading

Then Gloria Riggle began to read from the sacred text, "Zweben left no musical markings or instructions for the performance of "his" Carol, yet recent archaeological findings have yielded the following instructions: DEX is pronounced "decks" and, for purposes of this performance, is the plural of DEQX".

(The Great Anvil then said, "The DEQX was a mysterious electronic gadget whose purpose remains unknown. It was reported to have magical qualities when working; however, no such working unit is known to have existed or survived the great flood and apocalypse."

David reading

Then David began to recite the holy writ, "Performers should treat "Five SETs" slowly and with grandeur, and should pause after it's utterance, as in religious observation. 'Glases' is pronounced "glosses" and is the plural of "Glas," an obscure Bavarian automobile of the mid to late 20th centruy. Nothing is known of the history or whereabouts of Bavaria."

(The Great Anvil then said, "Bavaria and Germany are mythical "countries" or large territories pre-dating the Grand Unification. Some conspiracy theorists suggest that dubious shenanigans and rituals emanated from this region, including "Octoberfest" and "beer." Few artifacts of this culture remain besides the Glas "automobile.")

Julie reading

Julie then began reading the concluding remarks of the prophetic text before Harry would lead us all in the singing of A Most Joyous Roast of Harry Z, "Dis a Da Chef" is believed to be a form of Chinglish ...

(The Great Anvil then said, "Chinglish is an ancient language pre-dating the Grand Unication, now spolken by over 3 billion humanoids within the unified territories.")

... "For purposes of this performance, "Dis" is a play on the French "dix," meaning ten; "Dis a da chef" refers to a Chinglish telephone greeting in response to requests for food, soon to become unnecessary."

Harry concludes the reading of the sacred text saying, "Lowther, pronounced LAOther, refers to a particularly nasty, screechy and throughly unpleasant loudspeaker transducer of British origin."

(The Great Anvil then said, "British refers to another mythical territory, also known variously as "Great Britain," "England" or "The United Kingdom." It is widely believed that it was once ruled by "Kings" and "Unicorns, and that its most noble but least able and intelligent inhabitants fled to other countries and territories prior to the Grand Unification.")

At this point Harry led us in the song A Most Joyful Roast of Harry Z.

a most joyous roast of harry z

Harry singing

We all joined in with joyous singing!

David singing


A good laugh was had by all!

a good laugh by all

In addition to the 2014 ANVIL Award ...

stephaen and anvil award

... Stephaen and Pido had a very special award this year for Harry, The Booby Award. The idea is that everyone loves boobies, so The Booby Award is given out to those who are universally beloved, like Harry. So Harry becomes our first annual Booby Award recipient,which is given out to our most beloved boobies!

booby award

A Booby Award closeup! Word has it that they also make excellent equipment footers due to their squishiness!

booby award 2

After the awards we retired to Stephaen's listening room for some music and beverages!

Stephaen's listening room

Stephaen's listening room 2

Stephaen's listening room 3

The 2014 ANVIL Award gathering was as delightful as could be, with wonderful friends, great food, wine, laughter, and music lighting up the evening.

all of us

all of us 2

From all of us, thank you for joining us for the 2014 ANVIL Awards, and may the music light up your life and make you happy over the next Twelve Months of Anvil!

Thanks for stopping by!

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